A Hoarder’s confession of exceptionally peculiar stash-worthy loot in Blizzard’s Diablo 3.
Diablo players will sympathize, casual gamers of the world might have heard it by the virtual water cooler: it’s hard to not hoard useless albeit interesting or clever items in games.
To Salvage or Not to Salvage
Even with visiting the mystic to sometimes transmogrify an item into something cooler or re-rolling from Kanai’s cube, some items in Diablo will never be top-tier or even useful. All the same, it’s still hard not to hoard a digital item that strikes a chord with the collector part of the brain that says “I should keep this because it’s cool, nostalgic, rare, and/or totally my jam.”
Sometimes the item has special usefulness, as with the Puzzle Ring and Bovine Bardiche (each opens a secret realm filled with treasure in the game).
A “New Transmog” item’s usefulness is relative to your excitability for aesthetic in-game (or perhaps to find yourself in a crowd of spellcasting and minions). A transmog adds the option for the mystic in town to transform your gear to look like something else, without losing the abilities or stats of the original.
Bovine Bardiche Diablo 3 opens the cow realm by transmuting in Kanai’s cube 
Item – Puzzle Ring Dexterity stat in Diablo 3 opens the Goblin treasure realm
Witch Doctor Legendary Cat Off-Hand Mojo, Henri’s Perquisition 
Item Stats: Legendary Witch Doctor Mojo Henri’s Perquisition (Cat Off-Hand)
Fashion in Gaming (Not IRL)
Some hoard-worthy items certainly harken back to “World of Fashion Craft” where fighting “naked” and wearing certain items added a flair of fun to what can sometimes feel like more of the “same dull world wherever you go, whatever place you are at; the Earth is round, but everything on it is flat” (to quote Gaston Lachaille of Gigi).
The Horadric Hamburger looks like a Guinness World Record sized burger 
Horadric Hamburger stats Diablo 3
Fart Jokes will Never Die
In other cases, it’s a palm-face hoard-worthy item. Pox Faulds (or as some refer to them, “Fart Pants”) release a vile stench for weapon damage when multiple enemies are within a 12-yard range. The in-game equivalent of crop dusting out of panic, though with lethal results.
Geeky Sponsor
Leave a Reply